Chapter 2: Judgement part 2

=Ash doesn't say anything shes lost with in her own head, nothing can reach her now=

=i look Ash in the face, Zayne banging on the door= Ash, listen to me. I know what this is about, you feel like you had a choice where there was none, and that you chose wrong.

I watched as my team died, all because my orders slowed me down. I watched, burning plasma rifles, as an Elite broke every bone in my friend's arms and legs, before finally stabbing her in the heart. I saw an Elite kill my friend as he was sleeping, before having his body toyed with, like he wasn't even human, just some kind of kid's experiment. I watched as my friend was pulverized by a wraith, over and over and over again, until nothing remained of her body.

I felt like I had a choice to help them, and that I chose to follow orders rather than help them. In reality, I had no choice. My training prevented me from disobeying orders. I could not ignore those orders anymore than you can choose not to breathe.

You had no choice. Whatever it was, you had no choice. Tell me what it was, so you can be free.

Matt C. wrote:

I wake up on my bed back at base. I walk outside, the base alive like usual. I look at my leg, all patched up.

=The doctor looks out the 'window' of the ONI vessel at the fleeing ship, and watches until it is blocked by an asteroid, and then turns away, -slipspace rupture detected- and the ship vanished from the radar. The doctor returned to the cafeteria to eat his Steak and potatoes in silence, missing a potential friend and comrade. =

Why did his men flee from me? I wonder, have I become so detached from humans that others sense my insanity? My isolation? Do others really view me as an insane Doctor? Scientist? Perhaps I should reflect on this further.

=Ash looks a Dormii=
It was a tunnel; we just evacuated a hospital… I tried calling in for back up but... The pelicans they couldn’t get though, there were so many wraths. The Captain told us to get everyone in the tunnel...
They were so many injured and sick, we were there to help them save them… We couldn’t keep the hospital secure we were told there was evac on the way the wraiths destroyed everything. Then when we got everyone in the tunnels the… Brutes they… Oh god I can’t even think about it they, all burned them. I tried to get them out I had one of them in my arms… my hands, I couldn’t stop it! the screaming.. They wouldn't stop, I told them.. I told them a lie.

=Ash brakes down=
Then… The fire reached me, I was set on fire.. I was burning alive, when I woke up... I was..

=She looks back into nothing=

(Going afk if I'm needed in the story just say I'm in the Medbay.)

I sit up and pull my knees to my chest, i ignore Snow and Zeru, the one called Dormii had reawaken old wounds, thing i didnt want to remember. i closed my eyes but i could only see the broken form of my best and only friend in the rubble dead, the elite looming over her. tears that are hidden behind my helmet roll down my face, the things ive done in battle as vengence when i fought the covenent, most would have been considered inhuman against humans, but then again i wasnt fighting humans, but some of the blood lust showed through today when i was fighting that man named Torres, and i had his name carved into my armour to remember that.

=heads to the cafeteria for some food=

=i pick Ash up and carry her to the Medbay, Zayne still screaming behind us=

=to Ash= I hope you can hear this, because you need to know: what happened that day was not your fault. Blame the brutes for what they did, do not blame yourself. You tried to save those people, what you did was RIGHT. You tried to save people who had no way of defending themselves. You promised them something that was true, just because it changed does not mean you are to blame.

You did everything you could to save those people, do not punish yourself for something out of your control. It took me a long time for me to realize that, and even then, I needed help.

If it helps, for whatever relief it may give:
I forgive you.

Deis berunt tuum vivam, Ashlie Cole.
The gods bless you life.

Oh, before I forget, if you need a place, you can use mine. I hardly sleep there anyway.

=i bring her into the medbay and set her down on a table next to Jay. Jay has not moved at all since she was placed there. At some point, my bruises and cuts were healed, but by then, I was asleep next to Jay=

=gets done eating and heads to autopsy while there he notices something strange with torres's corpse=

=I continue to hum songs of my homeland=

Me: What do you propose we do now, Juli?

"i dont even know your name solider, or rank. mind telling me that?"

=Ash nods at Dormii not saying a word=
The smell I can still smell it... the noise..

=Ash heads for Dormii room but doesn't sleep.=
I can't sleep what if I dream about it again... I can't do that..

Me: I am sure you remember me.. you just can't remember me.

=Take out a spare dog tag=

Me: Corporal Snow, Medic. Ring a bell, sister?

"ah ya your that ODST i pulled out of that pod dureing the battle for Mairre 5, you would've died if i didnt get you" i remember that place, yet another planet that was lost in the war.

(He begins to calm down)
(whispers)
Let me out. please.
(He begins to break down)
(Zayne leaves and Draco takes control)
please.
(Draco unlocks the door)
Couldn't think of that of that yourself
(no response)
(within he can only hear sobbing)
(Draco walks out of the room)

Me: And then there was that time on Earth.

=Pulls out a picture from medical bag=

Me: On your "secret undercover op" when I saved your life..

=Picture taken from an over the shoulder picture on me Pre-wrapping Juli's burn wound on the arm=

Me: Well, maybe not your "life"

=through the comms cept the prison ones= this is zeru can u guys meet me on the bridge now please

(He goes off after hearing the announcement)
(He thinks to himself as he goes)
That was to close.
(He sighs)
(His thoughts wander around and falls back on that day. The day he saw Lynn)
If she survived then maybe.
(His thoughts transfer to the day he met Ash)
(He smiles as he recounted the events)
What knocked me out?
(He stops off at the cafeteria)
Hunger.
(He eats)

Me: Yep, "Good Times"

=Motioning to my medical bag=

Me: You need anything? You hurt?

=i wake up when i hear the announcement. I comm Zeru and tell him that I will be listening, but not there. I get up, check on Jay, she still hasn't changed. Other than the medical equipment beeping and otherwise telling me that she is alive, i would have been convinced that she was dead=

=i decide i need something to distract me, so i go to the cells=

=to Juli and Snow=

and how are we doing today?

Me: Nothing has changed with me, how 'bout you.

=I close my eyes and try to sleep, while still listening to Dormii=

(He gets done eating)
Best meal I have had in a while

(He forgets what he was doing)
Might as well had off to the cells
Got nothing else to do

=banshee scream into the cell=

You still don't get any sleep.

=i motion to Juli= She do anything?

(He hears the banshee scream)
Well looks like Dormii is here
(He enters the cells)

=I jump a little bit, and open my eyes=

Me: She has hardly moved since you Kunfu Kicked her..

=I glance at her=

=Sees Draco=

Me: =Alarmed= What is this..?

=Uncross my legs and put my hands on the ground like a little sitting down combat pose=

=i turn to Draco=
Oh, hey, Draco. How's things?

(He sees the other prisoner)
@Snow
I remember you

=I don't say a word, I have no idea whether to be alarmed that two killing machines are staring at me. Or not because they are calm=

@Snow
Hmm. Okay okay. Listen.
The name is Colonel Draco.

=to Snow= and you should remember me.

=I ease up and stand up and motion for a handshake=

Me: ... Nice to meet you..?

(He gives him a handshake)
@Snow
The hesitation in your voice.
why.

Me: Well.. I don't usually shake the hands of my enemies. Even though one of my saying is "I think you need to know someone to take their life." But still, quite intimidating.

i stay sitting where i am "i think you a little to comfortable with the enemy there Snow" i say to him

@Snow
"My enemies fear me. Even in death" one of my sayings.

(looks over at Dormii)
@Dormii
Thank You

=to Juli= So you would prefer to not burden yourself with knowing who you kill? How'd that turn out for your friend?

=to Draco= I'm not going anywhere, unless you want to move her. I need someone to talk to, and she's my choice.

=I turn to Juli=

Me: In peace time, an enemy is not an enemy.. but an acquaintance.

=I go back to sit in the corner=

(He takes a seat on the floor across the cells)
(He rests)

"well an enemy is an enemy to me" i say too to Snow, "and Dormii, tell me did you know all the names of the people you killed or are you like me, a mindless killing machine" i say sarcasticly

I know every single one of them. If I did not know at the time, I found out.

(radar, join chat)

Me: Sorry to interrupt but, I like enemies that don't kill us.

=I lay my head back to listen to the following conversation=

"well thats interesting, this is the first time ive fought against none alien enemies to tell you the truth and i was sent here with almost no intel"

(sorry i was doing chores while posting)

So then why did you accept the orders? How did you not know that you would die as soon as you stepped foot on this ship?

Me: =from the background= I did!

=Trying to act funny=

i look at Snow, then turn back to Dormii "its like i said earlier, ive had threats against me, my backs against a wall, metphorically speaking, and literally too" i chuckle

=i chuckle as well= So you came here because you would have been killed? I didn't know that the UNSC was that cruel.

"its not the military that hates me its ONI, but i think some of the higher ups dont like me either"

=I stand up to go sit by Draco=

Me: I guess we better get use to this, I have a feeling it will happen a lot.

=to Juli= What did you do to them? Kick their sandcastle?

=I chuckle when he says that, they both look at me=

=I get a serious face on=

"no i kinda disobeyed some orders, um... blew some stuff up, ya that type of stuff and well they said i did enough eventually"